Have you ever looked back on a hard time and been grateful? For me it was when the universe gave me space for my marriage.
I started a business in 2013 and started out making decent money. As I gained clarity and created a plan for my business that actually worked I started to bring in money.
And then I started to chase a shiny object that wasn’t a part of my “why”. Over time, my contracts ended and I lost money.
I was so busy before chasing this new shiny object that I let go of what was around me. Even my marriage.
The shiny object forced me to slow down and spend time on my marriage.
What the plan was
When I started in business my plan was to drive to the people and work on location. I started this business as a part of my thesis and knew that driving would not be sustainable forever.
It did provide me with income and experience.
Over time I started to lose income because I wasn’t able to drive out every weekend and I was spending most of my profits on ads!
I decided to take my business online and made the switch. I created a blog and started driving traffic. I started guest blogging and shortly after became an editor for another blog. I also was assisting another business owner with administrative work as a virtual assistant.
I was making money and, honestly, was in a good place.
The new idea
During research I came across an awesome idea I wanted to try out. I became obsessed!
I was still bringing on clients but in order to focus, I really needed to let go of some of the clients that took too much of my time. I knew I would have a greater return on my time investment focusing in this area.
By following this new idea I opened up time to rework my marriage.
During this time I did lose out on a lot of money. However I did learn a lot and don’t regret the decision.
As I focused on this new idea and was loving what I was learning I let some of my clients go. During this time, my business model shifted again allowing me to leverage more of my time.
Yet my world is not all business.
My marriage was struggling because we were no longer connecting and decisions had to be made. I am not one to give up but we were so off beat.
After bad news came out and then more bad news we were both faced with one choice.
We both knew we wanted to stay together so we did, but this required us to take an honest look at what was working and what was not working.
We started to carve out time to date each other again.
Not just once a month but we started going out once a week and our marriage changed over night.
It was still a long road, however now we made a decision and could take action.
During this time, you guessed it! I had to carve out more time away which meant less clients. Even with my business model shifting, I love to do one on one work.
It is more important for me to connect one on one or small intimate groups than have 50 women in one group where I cannot connect with each of them.
I have felt lost in business masterminds, and it isn’t fun.
I didn’t want to sacrifice my business, or integrity. I did have income but it was minimal and not what I could survive off of with my lifestyle.
So I stayed married and worked hard
Often times making the decision is the hardest part.
Looking back I know I stayed in my marriage for a lot of reasons.
- I still loved him.
- Afraid of failure on my own
- Support with the kids
- Kids having a full time mom and dad around
- And many other reasons.
Letting go of all of that money allowed me to focus on my marriage where it needed to be.
I shifted in so many ways, I made the decision to follow a new idea and let pieces of my income go.
I made the decision to carve out time each week that I used before on business to work on my marriage.
Getting back in the game
After I realized I was chasing a shiny object and that I was off course from my original “why” I started to look back over the year or so that had past.
My marriage was back on track so I could focus on the activities that mattered.
One thing was clear, the Universe always gives you what you ask for and what you need.
I needed some space to build back a relationship with my partner.
I thanked the Universe for that and took at look at my business basics, as I always do twice a year.
Where do I want to go?
What is my plan of action to let the Universe know I am serious?
Why am I doing all of this when I could be a stay at home mom?
While answering these three questions I discovered I was way of course.
Instead of beating myself up and being frustrated I gave gratitude.
Gratitude because without that time I would have gotten the divorce instead.
If I would have reached my full potential before that necessary decision to look at my marriage the fear of failure would have been gone.
I will always love my husband. Even if we separated during that time instead, I would have loved him anyway.
You can grow apart from someone and still love them.
But, if I would have had my own security, financially, I would have not put in the extra effort. It may have been harder for me to cut back or I wouldn’t have been able to scale both directions to fit my life.
It is a decision I will always be grateful for. Even though, as I shared in this post, I chased something down for over a year that wasn’t aligned with what I wanted.
I know now that this time was to give me space so I could focus on my marriage.
It taught me how to shift and look at my why more often.
It was during this time I crafted my morning visual practice, I worked with an energy healer long term, I honed my craft and my message because I was able to get back to the basics of business.
Looking back all of those decisions put me in a place where I needed to be, to work on something that was truly important to me.
#2 Think about the thing you want MOST to change in your life right now and create an intention to receive it
I wanted to send you this quick note before my family and I run out the door. We are celebrating my oldest little ones birthday today!
Her birth story started with a doctor telling me we had less than a 50% chance of survival.
She was born weighing just over 3 lbs and the ongoing weeks in the hospital let me see that I needed to make some drastic changes in my life.
I started with my career and this is why I am emailing you today.
Listen, I know you are tired of having the same struggles everyday. I know you are tired of going to work when you barely slept the night before.
I know you are tired of pushing your passions and visions down because no one around you understands why you would want to leave your job.
You want to be home with your kids,
Have regular date nights alone with your man,
Still have a clean house and healthy meals on the table,
and even travel while running your online coaching business.
I get it!
I do not believe in overnight success but there are ways you can make creating a business a little smoother.
1. Like knowing what YOUR destination looks like (quit taking on the same dream as everyone else)
2. Learning how to carve out the time to build a business when your life is already hectic (you have to spend the time in and on your business to see results. period.)
3. Knowing how to take your skills into business (this is the time to be authentic and do you. Your chances of success are greater when you are not trying to be someone else)
4. Knowing who your ideal client is and knowing your niche so you can speak to them when you market yourself online
Most moms wait for someday and year after year do not take action. They lose themselves and their dreams to the daily grind.
Let these five days be different for you.
p.s. This training is all about the steps I took to create my online business. Don’t let someday become never. You can take one easy baby step right now toward your goal, click here!
What a week it has been! I flew down to San Diego, came home and went on a field trip, took a day for Seattle with the family and then turned around and took two days and went to Oregon!
All in the last seven days!
Were these trips perfect?
In fact, by Sunday we were that family saying we would never travel with the kids again!
My man and I were laughing because we know that this isn’t true. We were just so exhausted and frustrated that we couldn’t see past where we were at.
And that is dangerous and why I am sending you this email.
To be honest, I was thinking of you while I was looking at “what we could have done better” and I thought that all of this applies into business as well.
Let me share some of the changes that would apply:
1. Planning – We didn’t plan out our stops and food like we traditionally do. We were on the fly this week which is fun and helps us adapt but kids thrive off routine. We try and travel with the same fruits and veggies we have at home.
In business, just like on vacation, there are times to be on the fly and there are times you need to look at your plan. We can get caught up in all of the wonder and possibilities the plan is there to help us reach our goal and not get caught up in the shiny object syndrome.
2. Time – We didn’t get ourselves enough time between the four different adventures and I know this because we still have a week ahead of us to play.
How often in business do we rush to see the results but we haven’t allowed the work we have done to settle? We rush because we want those big results right now but the truth of the matter is, you probably are not ready to have that 6 figure business if you cannot spare the time to work with clients.
3. Flexibility – We checked into the last airport to find that they overbooked. As we were frantically calling around for another hotel (they were all booked) I had to let go and be open to the possibility that we would find a room. Sure enough, that hotel had a cancellation right there with us in the lobby.
Even with a clear plan we won’t know how abundance will show up for us. It is about being open and having that flexibility in receiving.
Building a business is hard work and takes planning, time and being flexible.
Share in the comments with me what you want to create and what is holding you back.